:: Carou-buy ::

Can't stand it anymore!

Why don't you Carousell me away and Caroubuy another wife!

:: Woe is me ::

It's Carousell again. He's been shopping every night before bed, buying $20, $30 stuff that I don't even care about. Says they are for the home.

This morning was the ultimate moment. He just bought a $20 piece of decor last night and needed $100 to pay off something. He expected me to withdraw readily for him and pass the money to him this morning. He dragged me out of bed to the supermarket to withdraw it because I didn't do that last night. What a jerk!

I had married a man with increasing debts and I feel so sorry for myself. A man who cannot provide for his family and is not responsible for his spending. Blames it on my spending instead.

To date he has not cleared his decades-long debt of $8000 with his best friend, been withdrawing money ($1400 now) from our joint account like it's his personal credit card, almost agreed immediately to install aircon in the living room ($3000?) and his friend told him no hurry to return. That means never, John. Together we owe his aunt and late grandmother $19000 for the downpayment when we bought this flat.

He's been telling his friends that he hopes we'll have twins. I want to punch his head every time I hear that.

I'm just crying every night praying that his addiction will be broken and that he'll be able to come to his senses and realise how much it's affecting me.

:: Tables of Grief ::

These are the tables of grief, every time I see/think of them I cry.

:: been a long while ::

Facebook is too public.. So is Twitter (I don't even have an account) so it's back to good ol' blogger.

Been feeling depressed lately. A sense of loss. I quit my job and have no plans from April onwards. It also means that I am open to anything, anything at all.

Husband does not love me. Picks on little things that I don't even..

I would go Bkk on my own if things don't work out by then.

Staff asks for last min replacement.. The problem I hate most about this job. Well, at least I'm leaving.

Looking at photos of home decor I feel like crying when I think of the current status of my living room and bedroom 2.

My heart aches.

On a brighter note, on my solo adventure last night with God, He brought me to explore Tiong Bahru and almost got lost.. 

But there was a nice view on the overhead bridge above CTE.

Looking forward to my trip where I would get myself lost once in a while!

:: Thanks Apple!! ::

Changed from iPhone 3GS to iPhone 5 a few weeks ago! Credit goes to Theodore of course, but for now I would like to share what I'm most impressed about Apple's products.

Firstly, I'm very thankful for being able to restore ALL my data from my last backup to my new phone. As some of you know, my old phone died. I managed to do a backup before it finally gave up on me. Wasn't the most updated backup... But it had most stuff like my notes, contacts, calendar, apps, messages, photos, browser bookmarks, wallpapers, ... Everything is as if I left it as it is! That is very convenient for me because when I got the new phone I was worried that I had to set all my preferences all over again.

Now, secondly, was the Games Centre I guess. In my previous phone, I downloaded Plants vs Zombies under my friend's iTunes Store account. That was one app that didn't appear alongside the Maps and YouTube apps. I missed playing it and thought it was worth buying it myself, so I did today. You know what???! The first thing I saw when I opened the app was this!

:: First MC of the Year ::

Fell sick recently... Partly due to sick people around me, partly due to my body's immunity going down. Nevertheless, it was a perfect time to rest at home.

Saw the doctor on Monday morning, also asked her to check if I have diabetes, because my body was showing some symptoms like dark patches at the underarms, lines on the neck etc. The glucose test cost only $14, and I happened to fulfill the criterion to take the test - haven't eaten since 10pm the night before.

Did some packing of my room, cooked a very simple soup (quite gross actually!) with carrot, radish, cabbage, and spinach (wrong kind of spinach!!!), and then rest. Halfway through my rest the clinic called, said that she printed the wrong date for the MC, that I need to go and exchange for the correct MC. Groggily I went to the clinic.

The next day I was also resting at home, did some housework again. Then the day just went past. Thank God for this period of rest. =)

:: My First Time watching F1! ::

I received a free pass to catch F1 on Sat! Cuz Charlie's company gave him a single pass, while Elaine also received a PAIR of passes.

This pass entitled me a chance to watch from the Bay Grandstand, which is a very privileged seat! It was a terrible experience to squeeze my way to and fro the area though, because there were barriers all around. I could have joined Shirley, Isadora, Elaine and Charlie at Zone 4, but I wanted to experience sitting at the grandstand too, and make full use of the privileged pass..

I kept yawning throughout the qualifying race though. First time watching, don't really know what I was supposed to see. (I watched the finals with my dad on tv the next day and learnt a lot about what the drivers were doing.)

I was really tired from the whole day out, and the race ended at 11pm. Had to squeeze through the crowds to watch Maroon 5 live concert. :(

I enjoyed the concert, the band's really talented! But after that, everyone's squeezing their way out too. I just wanted to rest and wait so I sat down at the Padang.

Theodore came to find me to go home together. Missed the Circle Line home though we ran and went thru the gantry. :'( i was SO TIRED!! Managed to catch NEL home, thank God!