:: chill ::

i can't stand guys who... LIKES CUTE THINGS!!!
YUCKS!

hmm anyway.. update abt my life.. hmm thurs i was experiencing discouragement cuz my work is simply no good enuf.. ms lim simply says my illustration doesn't look 3d enuf n my partner tell me tt cannot use tt illustration, gotta do another one.. but my work style is like tt ma.. all the graphics were started by me, improved by him.. so i did the groundwork this time too, expecting him to help me refine.. but seems like he's not happy abt tt.. i rely on him too much? he seems to complain of too much work to do n i dump my workload on him too... haiz.. i realli dunno wad to say or do... so friday i felt very lost.. i even woke up late... like 11+am... dunno wad happened to me sia.. too tired.. v little rest thruout the week.. i dunno shld i go sch or not.. but have to meet deborah abt club crawl stuff so i went...

friday stayed back longer..although itz International Eat-With-Ur-Family day.. -.- my parents... going to changi village for dinner, i have to meet shirley bong to show her my progress for the mentor publicity.. haiz.. my progress not enuf... somemore in sch i dun realli dare to do outside sch work... or else my partner will buey song.. ... thank God shirley treated me to dinner~! save money again! hehehz. had cabonara at pasta mania.. i haven't been eating alot these days so tt meal was considered very filling to me! i couldn't bite anymore.. so i passed the bacon in my plate to chris.. he shaved his hair.. whoa.. b4 i saw tt itz him i thot he's some other mentor tt i nv met b4! shirley n i went to delifrance at the capitol theatre (ermz.. i dun realli noe building names well) ordered a vanilla frappe.. hmm spent $2, shirley forked out the rest..

can't rem which day i stayed up till 4am.. usually i stay up till 2am.. for these few weeks onli.. after all these i'm gonna have a good rest!!

sat had a prayer workshop.. on my way out from home i wondered if i shld go... i haven paid anyway.. a lot of work not done also.. but juz felt tt i cld use tt time to be ministered to... time (i stay home do work without inspiration) = time (go out get inspiration then do work faster..) so.. i went lor.. was 1 hr late la.. turns out my cell grp nv register for me.. so i registered on the spot lor.. listened to uncle david tok abt listening... then it was lunch time... hoho.. like lucky draw, my first pick on the food packets was my favourite choice!~ got chicken wing, rice, EGG! n nice chili.. :D ;D :D when i opened it i was like.. "HOHO~!!" hehehehe...

anyway the prayer workshop was quite ok onli.. i was lost during their role play.. 3 pple were toking abt prayer request, according to a script, i think.. then halfway rev daven cut in to explain stuff.. but i dunno wad they were trying to convey wor.. =x anyway maybe itz arrangement by God tt i shld sit beside auntie april, i noe her thru her son abraham who grew up together with all of us in sunday school... but he's backslided.. so prayed for him.. i believe God is going to do a great work!

after tt went to sentosa apply for the islander card... hmm.. sometime during this wk i muz go take a nice passport photo!! hehe v happy.. muz thank Jasmine my twin for accompanying me hehe.. then went to harbourfront to buy toiletries for shirley cuz there's SFC camp in church. went back to continue working on the flash.. but i was stuck... the movieclip kept looping in the same frame.. so i msged darius, called hilwan, msged seniors to help.. had dinner, leftover from the SFC camp.. thank God for providing free dinner again!! then went to prepare for worship practice.. great time..

esther drove me to andrew's place to continue working on the flash.. i dunno is it i suay or wad.. the moment i reached, andrew's comp crashed.. he couldn't retrieve the file he did for 2 hours... effort gone?~ haiz...i also cannot do anything to help.. then shirley came.. his comp crashed again.. o.0? doesn't like visitors?? uh.. around 2+am then shirley took taxi to church, n i went to slp. wanted to wake up at 5.30 am to prepare to go home, to prepare to go church. in the end woke up at 7+am... esther called.. so she brought her clothes for me, n drove me to church.. thank God for esther!

i sum up the day with guitar course.. v tired, but i dunno y juz cannot nap.. helped out with the refreshments.. haha.. then esther drove me home.. went to slp immediately.. until 9+pm.. my parents bought mac back =( i wanted to quit eating mac for a long while.. i thot they wld buy ramly burger from johor.. =( !!! go msia shld buy more special stuff back ma! hAIYE

wanted to slp on till the next day, but got things to do.. hmm.. ok i shan't complain anymore la..

later gonna call hx to tok abt something tt's starting to bother me... not abt work or guys. =x u all think tt's wad we tok abt heh?? haha jk la..

:: ups and downs ::

feeling a bit sad rite now..

the ogls r planning outing again...

maybe they're kind enuf to include me in their conversation...

maybe they're insensitive to the fact tt i cannot join them...

my designs were rejected today...

maybe i juz need to improve on them...

maybe i juz wan to give up... he's not giving me a chance lor...

my phone going to spoil liao sia...

maybe itz time to get a new phone...

maybe i shall become uncontactable for a while...

:: thank God!!! ::

u noe wad? i didn't spend a single cent today!!

thank God for His providence!

reached sch late..(again...) supposed to show ms lim some work... then i called her n left a voice message tt i'm sorry for being late lor.. she's forever not at her desk lor...

but i dun wanna c her la... so i'm glad i'm not around whenever she visits... but then i dun wanna give her the impression tt i nv do work lor.. pls la... i make things easier for my partners by doing the groundwork... i'm not the kind who can touch up on design...

went to pass my cartridge paper pad to gab at blk M, shun bian chat chat a bit with the ogls... meet jonathan n hx during lunch to catch up with each other... i cooked noodles to eat b4 i went out (since i was late already..erm =x.) so i didn't eat in sch la.. but hx treated me to bubble tea! thanks hx! it was great having tt meeting cuz it juz reminded me of the fun n relaxed times in thailand... it was a last minute meeting decided last nite after we chatted with mai n kikko..

of cuz i went off like tt, for one n a half hours.. (hey not as long as the "3 hour break" algernon always say cailing takes lor) whatever~ jinwen had to warn me to go back n do work.. haha suddenly i feel v lousy... umm.. i shall not go on.

anyway, after sch i went to visit the ogls again for half an hour like tt... then went to take bus to amk, then to bishan to go andrew's place.. thank God, i have enuf time to take bus, cuz i got bus concession ma.. reached bishan n met shirley. thank God andrew's mom cooked, so i can save on dinner.. it was a great homecooked meal! ate heartily, with icecream n mango pudding n guilinggao to follow... gosh...!

thank God andrew drove me home.. n i told them tt my vocal's training exam is coming up.. so they helped me suggest songs tt may be suitable for my voice! they analysed a bit like wad kinda songs is my type... etc.. so nice~! but i was stoned after staying n eating there for a few hours... haha... reached home not long ago...

:: my financial situation n gen 12 commissioning ::

ok guys let me share with u abt my financial situation...

i'm currently broke.. i dun ask my parents for extra money except on special occasions... i usually get har sib dollars per week.. but this week, wad i need to spend on... :

taxi fare to church on sunday - $14.30
monday's expenses on food (thank God for caleb for treating me to prata) - $2.80
my kelas bahasa fees (i'm taking the 9th lesson this level already yet i still haven't paid!) - $20
alkitab (indonesian language bible - IF possible) - $12
prayer workshop on saturday - $4
cell grp fund (for 4 months) - $8
islander card (the application fee is increasing with effect from 1st Jun so better get the card b4 then) - $15
owe kwek money for belly's present - $8

total - $84 - - - well past my weekly allowance

let me share abt wad else i need to spend on after this week :

monthly sponsorship fee for my son Nelson - $30
coming mission trip to tanjung balai excluding subsidy - $50
running shoes - ~$120
gift for parents - ~$90

total - $290 - - - will take me ~2 months to save up to this amount, provided i dun eat, which is IMPOSSIBLE
n of cuz if including meals for a glutton like me... i'll need God's providence n miracles to survive..

thanks guys for reading all these... note tt the above message means DON'T TEMPT ME BY SUGGESTING FINE EATING PLACES/ACTIVITIES. i'm gonna stay home for meals whenever possible already la.

anyway today.. went to Foochow Methodist Church for Spiritual Multipliers (SM) training. n commissioning for the pple going on mission trips this week. had 3 X teh/teh tarik today... (4, if including the ice lemon tea i sipped from shirley's cup). the worship session was good, i kinda prayed tt it wld last forever hahaha... starting to wonder, if onli i can learn bass guitar... sounds fun.. n the coolest thing today is tt i met esther cheong......in the middle of Little India!! of all places lor!! haha... cuz she's going for the commissioning too.. then she kinda lost her way haha..

the message brought by Holly Sheldon was good too... makes "going out" an exciting thing! blessed the mission trippers with prayers.. anyway i was sharing with gloria abt the SM training.. i was rather angry (when i say angry usually itz an emotion in my heart tt i dun realli express) actually.. cuz today is my only holiday n yet the SM training had to take up half the day... but it was good in a way it dug out a problem tt i have.. if i dun expose this problem n pray abt it, it wld probably grow within me like a parasite. ok, wad else? hmm i missed bowling with the ogls today... simply no time.. besides if gab not going cuz she's doing her studio project, it wld be unfair to her if i go. n abt my meeting with shirley today.. hmm, gotta say sorry cuz i was stoning half the time.. dunno y so tired...

hmm yday was yau's bday if i nv rem wrongly.. i had the insane idea of calling him to c if his voice is realli the same voice as "Calvin" 's! haha... in the end i nv la.. dunno y i always plan to do some things but forget to do in the end de....

:: my heart bleeds ::

i finally saw the kitten again... it juz kept mewing at me... when i keep quiet, it keeps quiet too.. well i've tried to communicate with it for like 10 min... but decided to give up cuz it ran away... mr calvin, our orientation camp trainer saw me too... haha.. but when i think of itz mewing my heart juz felt pain for it... maybe u might think itz insane la.. but my love for cats cannot be described by words, but onli by the pain i feel, to leave them alone, calling out for food, for company...

today... the ogls had meeting... i wan to join them for activities, but cannot... (sigh i noe i say this a lot of times already) okok i'll try to focus on my work n stop thinking abt having fun. but difficult to focus on work leh... the working environment in blk L juz sucks. they keep having VIPS coming over... dunno for wad sia... always muz act hardworking, wear the lanyard.... argh... sorry for saying all these... not wad an angel shld say... :( maybe can say tt i'm not in gd mood recently ba...

campus crusade... haiya, christine put me in charge of worship for monday's gathering... i'm not in the rite spiritual condition wor.. i noe tt all the more i shld discipline myself RITE NOW to get rite with God, but ... haiz.. my mindset is, EVERYBODY OWES ME A HOLIDAY! NOW!! monday is a holiday...i realli wan to stay at home to pack my stuff, arrange them.... nowadays so busy i go home juz put my bag down... wadever i buy also put aside... no time to appreciate... sucks..

anyway... now itz half an hour more to my sis birthday... i dunno wad i can get her... uh... sms? hmm... HAPPY BIRTHDAY~! have a great time in Ko Samui!

:: u noe u're a... when.... ::

u noe u're a... computer geek when... u tok abt Windows n Dos in a room.
u noe u're a... web designer when... u joke abt www.guanyinma.com for talismans to burn n drink.
u noe u're a... photographer if taking out a camera is the first thing on ur mind when u come across a traffic accident.

ok, wad else.

u guys got any to add? haha.

:: good la! ::

the ogls n some of the yr 3s having holidays now... they like ping ming go out lor... i v poor thing stuck in sch... but today got chance *hehe* went for SDN club meeting... the meeting like none of my business lor.. i join the resource coordination team like for nothing sia... as a sch of design club we all r equipped with the skills to design stuff for publicity ma... y give tt job onli to publicity team? hmm..sorry ah, but i'm still dwelling on this question.

anyway went into FYP room do a bit of work then sian, v cold.. came out to take a walk.. went to find the ogls.. they were at th sports stadium there, some were playing bball, some playing card games.. i joined them for a while then went for cca.

after cca called them to join them for dinner. we took bus all the way to bishan then we got separated cuz we couldn't settle on one place to eat.. i got a bit hot tempered la, make me come to bishan n then cannot fellowship together.. think shaun noticed it, even tho i juz raised my voice.. i tried to look jokingly angry...

had ban mian at S11.. chatted after we finished our meals.. helped them make plans for tmr but it was rejected by sheralyn's "tmr rest la"... haha... bo wei gong.

went to cafe cartel to sit down for drink... left at 10pm... reached home around 11.30 lor.. dunno wad my mom gonna say eh.. cuz yday i reached home late too... went out with ting.. met her at 8+pm.. i read a whole book on photography... v interesting n inspiring... then sat at shaw house the macCafe until 10+pm..

:: deuhk laew ::

so late already...wad am i doing online?

well.. i got a lot of things to do but no mood to do.. now learning thai from a book i borrowed last week. been borrowing the same book abt 3-4 times already, always can't finish it cuz there's a lot to learn.. there's a lot of exercises to do too..

now hx is working nite shift... kinda wan to accompany her haa.. but i sure cannot endure the whole nite... going to slp soon..

last nite i nv dream.. finally.. n today was quite a bad day... met many pple tt made me go "argh!".. hmm..
anyway it has been proven thru experience tt i can wake up earlier, the later i slp. so..

*itz kinda stupid to put a secret on a public blog la... so i've decided to remove it.*

:: think too much ::

suddenly i become v emotional... shit.

tt nutcase called me again, this time his name is Calvin, but he's still looking for Geraldine. -.-" can someone send him to mental hospital? i still wan to go malaysia one lor..

:: funny dreams again ::

to nic: haha i dun rem very clearly abt my nitemares la.. onli vaguely wad happened... cuz when i woke up i try to rem the details... or else i will forget very quickly..

anyway sat nite i dreamt tt i left my bag in city hall... in the middle of the nite i woke up my dad to send me there to get my bag back... i was praying tt it wouldn't be lost, cuz my wallet with my IC is inside... the thing is, city hall isn't wad it actually looks... it looks more foreign, like european kinda place.. then my house doesn't look like my house, not even my old home! looks more like a chinese home (i seem to rem there was an altar?? :S

then last nite i dreamt tt my sis returned to singapore today.. she didn't tell us.. n i dunno y i went to changi airport n happen to c her juz arrive.. haha.. but i have no chance to entertain her cuz i gotta go sch... hahaha..

i realise i quite long nv update abt my whereabouts... too much abt dreams... haha.. hmm last wk quite busy, as usual.. monday went to tan tock seng hospital to get a jab but didn't. i think i mentioned tt..

then tuesday supposed to have dg, but i still couldn't confirm it so i went home after my worship practise with deborah. din come for FYP cuz supposed to go zoo, but my partner bringing his gf...

wed left FYP around 3pm to prepare n lead worship for LM.

thur stayed back until 6+ then took mrt to orchard, walked around borders n kinokuniya to confirm there's the magazine called Tropical. itz sold for S$6. not bad la.. if next month the Old Phuket Hotel gets featured, i might buy it la. anyway haven't seen tt mag sold in other stores.

fri went home for dinner, but mom was in chinatown... so dad n i had to have dinner by ourselves. he asked me whether i wanna go "blk 198 (in punggol) or changi", i asked "changi where?" he said "changi village lor" then i say "can ah!" hahaha weee good food!~ had bak kut teh n pig's trotters... yummy..... went home n watch tv.. the ch 8 fann wong show last episode.. i onli started watching it halfway thru the serial.

sat went to church earlier to meet shirley bong to talk abt the publicity for mentors. then cell grp.. went back after cell grp.. met my parents in hougang for dinner.. had thai chinese cuisine! i told my mom tt when i eat with them i can save my own money... uh-oh i think they're starting to think tt i'm being money-minded... then very weird my mom started to compare me with my cousin.. she juz mentioned tt my cousin is able to work while studying, able to pay for her driving lessons, etc... argh! i want to work also, but i simply have no time! usually jobs require weekends, n i commit my weekends to church wor.. my weekday nites r for me to rest after school lor.... want me to overwork meh...

sunday woke up around 8+, late for church, after i prepare all tt.. after service went to tend the guitar course registration booth... next week is the course already!~ haha.. hmm.. jac n jeff waited for me to wrap up, n the rest of my cell grp were still at the bus stop.. caught up with them n went to AV for lunch.. hmm if onli they went harbourfront this week.. =X cuz i was going to meet my frenz to go for the NAFA graduation show... i was super late, being the organiser.. =X!!! pai seh... sorry to all! i feel bad to say tt i have been busy collecting namecards tt i nv realli appreciate their art work... oops... but got a bit of inspiration of wad to do thru their works.. maybe i might go down again someday to realli look thru.

from there we walked to the church i study Bahasa in to take bus to Zouk. there was a flea market... i used to be v enthusiastic abt it, but nowadays a bit sian, probably itz becuz i wasn't successful when i applied for a stall the last round..? hehe.. so petty.. anyway bought a.. wad to call it, bracelet? for myself n for darius, since he like the one i bought form thailand so much.. after tt slack in the winebar... until around 6+pm then we started to move off.. we were going to esplanade for some concert... walked all the way there from Zouk!!!~ v tired, but saw a lot of nice stuff to photograph along the way... cool~! hx n i talked along the way... v nice time...

when we reach esplanade the concert was starting, i realise itz the kind of music i dun like..so i decided to walk around esplanade instead... hx joined me, then shaun n wendy also.. we walked to marina square for dinner... i dun like Long John's... so i nv eat..ordered a clam chowder but it kinda sucks.. (to my standard it sucks) then darius n herman joined us, then kevin. around 9+pm we walked back to esplanade to find the rest.. gab still wanted to hang out.. i dun mind.. wanted to find out how the new club at Fullerton looks like.. so juz walked there.. then walked to boat quay to find a jazz pub to sit n chat.. ended up walking a big round... hx n wushan left. we settled in TCC... decided to save money so i din order any drink. kenneth sent me home.. hehe.. thanks v much~! reached home around 12.30am... mom asked how come i came back so late but i dunno how to answer her.. hmm..

this morning hx called at 7.30am to wake me up... but i still lie in bed, want to slp somemore.. hehe..

:: nitemare II ::

nitemares often come in more than one nite sia.. last nite dreamt of some weird old building too.. it has many rooms, like a hospital or sch.. the building is white.. it was around afternoon like tt..

there were my IM frenz... n 2 old/middle aged men (cheats)... i simply dun like the way they look.. i had brought more than $100 with me during my stay at that building.. n i rem being in a room with my parents n the 2 cheats.. they were explaining n promoting something to them, while i was sitting back n looking at the beautiful scenery (sunset) outside the big window..

i dun exactly rem the sequence of everything, but there were parts tt i rem.. like hilwan, jinwen they all were sitting on a ledge on the 2nd or 3rd storey, n joking abt leaning back n pretend to fall.. then someone tripped wan, but he escaped tt trip.. but he lost his balance n tried to land properly.. n he did.. then dunno wad already la..

also got another nite i dreamt tt i was in a primary school.. supposed to be my pri sch but it didn't look like at all.. the building was blue and yellow... beside the sch was a compound where the principal n his family stayed. none of my frenz were there... it was around evening time.. i rem running around, trying to find a way out.. i could c outside but couldn't seem to find the exit.. i even asked the principal for directions to get out.. the outside looks like pandan reservoir, my sec sch environment... i saw a snake somewhere n tried to notify someone.. anyway.. can't rem much abt those nitemares..

:: sad sia ::

i had 2 flowers at first.. then this morning i saw the can overturned (but still on my ledge tho) n one of my flowers had dropped!! i scared it might juz die like tt then i put it into a container...

anyway juz now i called up kino n borders to ask abt this travel mag called Tropic for my sis.. i prefer calling borders cuz they play jazz while they put me on hold.. i feel the operator was much more polite too... maybe later b4 my kelas i'll go either one to check it out...

sch's boring, as usual...

:: nitemare ::

had some weird dreams..maybe i wun call it nitemare cuz it wasn't very bad dreams.. i was at church.. leading worship i think.. then i told either ting or judy abt it.. ting came to support me.. haha.. when i saw her i screamed "ah lian!!" i thot i saw judy... hmm.. i think i mixed them up... =X

then i rem my dad was in front presenting something i dunno.. i also rem there was a wedding service... n the groom was ANDY (LI)!! i asked ting how old is he already, she said 40 yrs old already.. (whoa...) his bride had red hair wor..

after the wedding service the couple drove away from church n i got a lift from them to go just outside the church... some ogls were sitting there n chatting -.-"

then i went back inside the church to go toilet.... the church was actually in quite a rundown state.. =X then ting was waiting outside for me n making sure no one comes in cuz there was no door to the toilet....! i heard guys' voices outside tho.. i came out n saw kelvin n jon yap... hahhahaa... later dunno how already... the church realli looks like the state it was in 15 yrs ago... when i was v young!!

vinee bloom

vinee bloom
Originally uploaded by djgemz.

this was taken on the 9th may 2005... look wad happens the next day~!

vinee full bloom
Originally uploaded by djgemz.

wee!! this is the 2nd day of bloom!~ the petals r open wide already!

:: break ::

at this point in time i juz wan a break... a retreat...

i felt angry for not getting a holiday altho i deserve it...
i felt angry for being so poorly organised...
i felt angry for not being able to find my vaccination card..
i felt angry for oversleeping every day...

i muz commit my anger n my burdens to the Lord, n allow Him to minister to me...

rite now i'm feeling better... went home to slp after i went to tan tock seng hospital... supposed to get my 2nd dose of Hep A vaccination but none of my frenz r taking it, cuz it costs $40... supposed to go back to sch at 6 for prayer meeting with Campus crusade.. but i felt tt i need time to rest n get myself together b4 doing anything...

realli felt better now...

juz finished preparing the slides for worship... may God always be here with me.

:: super broke ::

haiz... if onli my sis can send money to me... i'm broke!!!

bought new clothes for dallas' wedding, gotta pack red packet for him.. spent $8.50 on movie n $38 on ktv last week... i've got to pay the sponsorship fee for my "son".. overdue already lor.. my mom has been v kind to subsidise $60 for the red packet, my dad gave me $50 last last week for "juz in case"..... i feel v bad to have spent them already... i regret going ktv actually....

anyway.. today i wanted to look pretty pretty... it was difficult... cuz i dunno how to apply eye shadow, kena my eye until it turned red like some ghost sia.. put glitter on my eye but decided it was not a gd idea... in the end i smudged it all over my face... :S everyone asked mi if i'm very tired at the end of the wedding ceremony.. -.-

but was v happy for the couple... kinda glad tt for a while i dun need to think abt work or other stuff... i even switched my hp to silent mode the whole day to avoid calls.. yeah i went back to the escapist mode where i dun wan to answer any calls.

went to hougang mall for dinner with my parents.. had a lot of food sia... sambal kangkong, green curry chicken, sotong you tiao, braised beef, cereal prawns.. n rice. didn't get anything for her or godma for mother's day cuz i'm broke.. =(

:: bad day ::

today is quite a bad day.... yday also.... kena pangseh... after my indo class i asked gab if the ogls r still hanging out... she said they will wait for me.. juz when i reach amk they left already... but at least gab n some of them stayed to wait for me la...

honest time again... i dun feel v happy helping my cca do stuff... not tt they dun appreciate or dun treat me nice... but i juz dun like... christine asked me to meet her yday to ask me if i can co-lead dg with her... i have no reason to say no.. then lynn asked mi if i can lead worship for LM last wk.. i told her i got orientation, can onli lead next week... n she realli scheduled me to lead worship next wk.. then she told me wad to do, cuz it wld be my 1st time.. i have to select the songs, prac with my worship team by wed lor.. dunno tue going zoo or not.. =( juz now deborah called to ask wad time we can meet up.... then she kinda scolded me for poor time management.. if i have fypj i shldn't have agreed to leading worship... i feel damn sad now... =(

then this morning the lecturer in charge of my fyp called me while i was on my way to sch, cuz i was late again... she noticed i haven't been around due to the orientation so she told me to work harder... =( sian... i dun like to do this fyp, esp when my mind tells me tt i shld be having my hols now instead of doing work in sch....

pray for me for motivation...

:: haven't been a good angel ::

hmm... feel kinda moody these days... pms...

juz feel tt i haven been a good girl... my friends always call me angel, but lately i dun feel like one..

been suaning pple until quite jia lat.. then i get offended v easily.. a lot of careless words juz come out of mouth.. i realise tt i tell lies too.. honestly, dunno if algernon is reading this.. =X this morning i woke up late... when he called me i was awake for a while already but i kinda acted like i realli juz woke up... to buy time perhaps... but i juz dun have motivation to do fyp, no motivation to go zoo with him to take photos... muz pray tt i will change this mindset...

been badmouthing pple too.. like torrence.. itz bad, not rite to do tt, but i juz tell pple who dunno him, how he's like.. hmm.. i also get irritated easily by pple around me... like juz now i was ordering food for dinner.. the china woman juz looked past mi n ask the guy behind me wad he wan to order.. i so pissed off lor. then i quickly shouted my order.. haha so kiasu.. but i juz keep giving a very pissed off look, to show tt "hey dun make me angry".. n today i find someone v irritating... but i try not to show it.

ok honestly too, i juz dun like pple from china.. those type who push their way thru a crowd, those who expect pple to pay them for acting as extras (among so many pple from other countries tt day in chinatown, they were realli the onli ones who r like tt).. those who steal pple's husbands... those who make so much noise (they juz like to talk loudly huh)... ok i'm wrong to have discrimination against anyone... but i'm juz being honest abt it.. i dun act friendly in front of them.. i juz dun tok to them n dun like to hang out near them.

hmm muz pray for me to get over this feeling... itz realli not something a Christian shld do.. maybe avoiding them might help easing the "hatred"? haha...

actually i haven been gd, becuz i haven been spending enuf time with God.. every nite i read Psalms n draw lessons from each chapter, n trying to translate a indonesian daily bread, but i haven't been putting my heart into hearing God speak... it was more like getting it over n done with.... shouldn't be the case....

pray for me ok, my friends!

n yina is rite, liking someone becuz he/she looks gd is superficial... i have been superficial... but i kinda got used to this sorta lifestyle... can i continue? or shld i change? suddenly i juz dun have the 'feeling' to wan to fall in love... but i've been wondering if pple wonder y i dun have bf? anyway there's this saying i still find true: you are not wad u think u are. you are wad u think i think u r. uh get wad i mean? in another words, i am not wad i think i am. i am wad i think u think i am. understand better?

PICT8063

PICT8063
Originally uploaded by djgemz.

ok i think i dun look nice here.. haha..

:: pa-toh-ing ::

haha i went patohing with my ah lian huixiang today~!

woke up blur blur wondering where my parents have gone to... was quite upset.. they always disappear one lor... almost called to ask them where r they when i suddenly remembered my mom asked me wan to go safra or not... n i kinda rem replying her "gai tian la" (means "another day, lah").. haha!

anyway went online for a while then prepared to go out to meet hx at chinatown..

we walked around temple st first, saw a stall n then decided to try on a dress... it makes me look fat... no figure.. haha.. so dun wan.. my purpose of going out today is to source for evening gown for dallas' wedding dinner! went to this fashion n tried on several pieces of clothes... some looks realli nice, but today is not the day to buy them... anyway this fashion clothes getting more n more expensive sia..

took bus to lavender to pei hx look at her attachment work place.. quite ulu lor... :S we got off a stop after the rite one.. cuz we couldn't get to the door in time.. stupiak pple block our way... :@! walked back to lavender mrt tt stop n went inside a Zen Tradition showroom.. got weird smell sia.. i like the furniture, but no money to buy hahaha..

took quite a few photos along the way...

walked to bugis n on the way we stopped at ya kun's kaya toast... wasn't feeling in the best of mood... ordered kaya toast set for hx n cheese toast set for myself... the auntie served the toasts n i asked whether itz the cheese one. she juz said "ya", without telling us which one is the cheese one... n turned out all of those r NOT cheese ones! stupiak! i went to ask for my cheese toast n then they finally serve one to me... ...

oh ya i mentioned we were walking to bugis.. we went inside seiyu n walked around... saw peilin n her bf.. went upstairs to Muji to find my cousin who works there.. she was v busy... haha.. anyway we continued to shop... bought a top from this shop called Double index.. i was very worried cuz 1stly i'm not v sure how maroon colour looks like n 2ndly also not sure if the top matches the skirt n 3rdly whether i'll look formal enuf for the occasion or not.

went to the this fashion at bugis to buy the skirt tt i tried on in the chinatown branch.. walked to bras basah the bus stop.. played with a cat there...v cute!!! then hx asked me if i knew abt this phone number 6333 1411. i nv heard of it so i dialled the number lor... heard something funny.... forwarded a msg to some of my frens to call tt number too.. hahaha... most replied "wad the hell.." haha!

boarded bus 33 to chinatown... had dim sum (yummy!~~~) n chinese tea.. was worrying if i have enuf money to pay sia.... but thank God we have juz enuf money.. hehe... took mrt home..

haiya have to send email to freshmen for my cca again.. honestly i feel irritated to keep sending email.. esp when i nv save their contacts, n some of the email accounts r void... haiz.. keep receiving bounced mail.. stupiak.

:: happening ::

friday the ogls were having their meeting... i wan to join them but too bad i got fyp.. but i occasionally pop by to c how their discussion is coming along.. then at the fyp i felt quite pissed with the lecturer in charge.. cuz she came in to save the work into her zip disk... she changed some settings on the comp n i couldn't access some files after tt... then she kinda dumped the problem for me to solve lor...

christine called me to send notice to freshmen regarding the bbq on sat.. then jasmine n vincent came to my sch... i had something to discuss with jasmine ma, so i asked weiyang to come join us also... so tt vincent wun feel outta place. we went to orchard.. bought movie tickets to the movie Divergence at Shaw Lido, then went downstairs to get something to bite during the movie. the movie not very nice.. i dun like the ending cuz daniel wu died in the show... =( haha...

after the movie jasmine n i found out tt we r both born on the same day!!! wow! kinda the first friend i have whose birthday is same day as me!

anyway we went to kbox at cineleisure... i dun have money on me la.. but felt deprived of karaoke-ing... so i decided to borrow from the guys.. we started at 10pm... ended at 4am... funny tt i actually dun lose my voice singing the whole nite... usually i lose my voice after singing a while... took photos... v cool.. weiyang can sing... jasmine also.. gd... vincent sing until he block nose but still continue to sing...

took taxi to jasmine's house to stay over... she has a dog.. dun lick me can liao.... she woke mi up around 9 or 10+ am.. i should have left earlier..cuz meeting shirley bong in the afternn in church.. but i muz go home first... in the end i couldn't make it in time... i reached home at 1.45pm lor... but then again.. when i stayed at her house a bit longer i got the chance to see her photos n also help her as she prepare to go out.

went home n bathed.... felt quite bad cuz i haven't been spending much time at home this week... got nagged by my mom.. felt a little back ache cuz i nv slp n rest enuf...

went out again, to cell grp... tired... after cell grp had vitra then went home.. bought cup noodles along my way home.. wanted to eat after i bathe.. but my dad asked mi go out eat with him... i heck care abt my clothes.. i was in singlet n shorts lor.. haha..

anyway this morning i was late for church service hahaha... saw brian tan.. felt quite tired during the sermon but managed to stay awake. chris was preaching n i found one part meaningful.. refining silver.. is a tedious work, the silversmith sits n keeps his eyes on the workpiece, making sure it is not under- or over-burned. once he can see his reflection on the workpiece, he noes tt the refining process is completed.

went for lunch with m'kaddesh.. saw my god-parents... long time no tok to them liao... found out tt amber is learning thai in sch!! cool!! asked her to teach me thai too... =P

went back to church at 2pm.. prac dallas' wedding item.. i'm part of the 12-men choir hohoho... prac untl 4... quite fast i wld say... esther came back from india! she drove mi n elena n shirley to city hall... i took mrt to bishan to go to ogl ic's house for their meeting... quite happening..

had dinner with them n joked abt pairing them up... mi ended up being paired up with someone too.. -.- haiyo~ went home by bus 156 with nic n ina... had cup noodles for dinner... watched Enter the Phoenix... part of it, actually... i think itz nice.. maybe i'll get the vcd? or maybe juz save up the money for House of Fury... haiz.. missed tt movie....

:: fun times ::

so fast, the ogl training camp 2004 for SDN is over already!! had great time helping out as the instructor's assistants... one year ago we were participants lor.... still can rem rather vaguely the things that happened... there were laughter there were tears... my body was super stretched by the physical conditioning lor.. n time seemed to pass quite slowly n eventful.. as helpers howevers we juz sit back n relax n time seems to pass much faster n easier... our juniors who r the one participating in the games r the ones being stretched now, but things seem easier for them too... we r not allowed to tekan them... we r also not tt mean to tekan them anyway.

i've been taking photos of them... i shld have uploaded the photos regularly so tt i can take more higher resolution ones lor... haiya. i've also been the one taking down the scores of the 4 teams... felt appreciated... hehe v happy...

at the moment i'm so happy with the ogls i feel v reluctant to do my final year project n campus crusade stuff... i'm supposed to call pple up to ask them if they're joining our activities, but i feel tt if i'm the freshmen, i would feel irritated tt pple keep calling me up just becuz i helped them to fill up a survey.

i've learnt alot thru this camp. alot abt leadership.. i should not regret my decisions if that is what i have chosen. I HAVE A CHOICE, i dun have to sulk whole day cuz i m being confined within conditions, rules n regulations. ALL FOR ONE, ONE FOR ALL, in a team, we ought to do things together, like stand under the rain together, go thru forfeits together... yeah tt's the main lessons i learnt.

today i nv go fyp...so sian... went home to unpack my stuff n get ready for my kelas bahasa later... tmr going out with jasmine.. sat going lunch with shirley bong, sunday "choir rehearsal"... hmm... my weekend is packed already sia...

:: one line that says it all ::

i've thot of a line, that describes me as a designer as well as someone who depends on God!

God is the greatest creative designer, I get my ideas from Him!

:: busy busy busy ::

went for chalet after IMPJ and recruitment meeting... went back home at 8+am to go collect books from Crest with Tricia. had lunch with her n jianxiong at green view cafe... (mee hoon kuey!) then jianxiong drove me to church. typed in the book details until it was time for cell grp. alan n zane saw the books and cds and were interested to buy straight away.. haha..

after cell grp i stayed back to wait for Psalmist preparation time. then wee lee told me i'm on for vocalist duty... hmm then ok lor.. i stayed back until 9+pm.. rushed around the sanctuary to do vocals, help jieling with projection abit, then set up table for PRC.. so fun.

rushed to chalet to join the rest of my class for BBQ... haiz.. a lot of pple left already.. felt upset tt they nv leave enuf food for me.. then jinwen kind soul bought fried rice for me. i tried to slp but couldn't.. so stayed up to watch Shutter... cool horror movie... wanted to watch Ocean's 12 after tt but my eyes couldn't take it anymore.. so decided to slp. woke up at 6am to go back home.. my planning quite zhun.. i reached around 7am n went out at 7.30am, reached joshua's house at 8.10am n reached church at 8.30am.. praise God!

rushed to the PRC straight after service to sell books and cds... muz rem next time bring in more Chris Tomlin's Arriving, devotionals, bibles etc. didn't sell any Hillsongs cd wor.

after wrapping up the PRC, tricia n i took taxi to far east plaza to return the books. since we were early we decided to go eat instead, at shihlin's at level 1. it was quite nice, but expensive sia.. the table v small also. after returning the books (we managed to balance the total perfectly, thank God!), we went downstairs. tricia showed me a top she wanted to buy n i bought one too!

took bus to plaza singapura then took mrt home. dozed off on the train until my plastic bag dropped twice! reached home n went to slp immediately... guess wad time i woke up? 3am! decided to go back to slp.. until 7am...

went to sch for FYP briefing.. i was assigned to grp up with SIT. now doing nothing but gotta plan for the project. i also have to send emails for my cca to freshies to invite them to come for the freshmen outing... hotmail sux!! i have to keep pressing the send button n go back to the page because ONE email address is not available n wad shit. spent 1+ hour on tt sia...

i'm very frustated!! i've been trying to hard to relax the last 2 days since the end of my IMPJ... but i had to send this email thing.... =( i also have to call up freshmen (supposed to do all these by sunday) but no time!!!

:: weee...busy girl ::

i like to be busy, but only with things i like to do... been keeping late nights the last few days to bia IMPJ... FINALLY OVER!! like xian hao says: i'm a free man! presentation was alright i would say, i went in with the mindset ready to be criticised. realli, cuz my grp the work standard is just ok onli. stayed back after presentation to wait until 6pm... the rest r going for the FYP n IAP briefing, but i got recruitment meeting with my cca frenz. ze jian played marbleblast on my laptop... the game was exciting la, managed to keep mi awake and wide eyed even tho i was v tired...

typed minutes for the recruitment meeting until my laptop ran out of batt...

eileen spilled the coke on the table, quite near my laptop.. thank God it was wrapped and protected already, n thank God zhihui was sitting near it, not me... becuz he immediately removed my laptop from the table... i would stare blankly at the accident n forget to react!

went home to bathe, then went to the IM chalet after tt... juz a few pple, jinwen, darius, hadir, hadir's friend sabrina n me... luckily cat is coming, or else i would be the onli girl.. altho i'm used to it, still itz not nice la. she came with weng heng n alex... hairol arrived around 12+am.. we went to Cheers to buy cup noodles...tried the Nissin chili crab flavour... v shiok, but a lot of spring onions... DFV was also having their chalet at the same place n same days... so we went over to Blk L "level 5" to visit them.. well blk L is the building in NYP where we do our work at. n level 5 is the exact storey. there were a lot of designer jokes la.

alex was telling ghost stories (i was praying tt Jesus will protect me from evil spirits) n he joked abt www.guanyinma.com (there isn't such a site la i think), where pple can go n print out talisman n burn to ashes, add water then drink. n as designers, we joked tt the talisman muz be printed on quality glossy paper! haha... we also toked abt the sound of children playing marbles we hear at night.. darius said he nv heard tt b4. n alex was going to say "maybe after the chalet when u go home u will.........(darius was going to say "choy")... hear basketball dribbling!" we all broke out laughing... hairol added on, "maybe not basketball, but BOWLING BALL!" haha n crash thru the ceiling rite!

anyway i went to slp after 3am... they were watching Smallville on rizman's laptop... i'm not tt interested in Ch 5 tv dramas... i woke up at 8+am.. went home to bathe n get ready to go out... i'm supposed to receive melissa's email, but didn't leh... hmm... i'm going out to meet tricia now to collect the books n cds for PRC. tonite hopefully i can join my classmates for bbq!

:: mushroomland ::

PICT8022
Originally uploaded by djgemz.

mushrooms growing in the middle of punggol!! so much tt itz like a town of mushrooms!

:: vinee ::

PICT8020
Originally uploaded by djgemz.

vinee is all grown up already... can u rem the last pic i posted of it? hmm.. but lately the plant seems to be dying... =(

:: geylang on sunday nite ::

PICT8013
Originally uploaded by djgemz.

i realli like going to such places, with old shophouses still around...

:: pokie all over the groundsheet ::

PICT8009
Originally uploaded by djgemz.

:( we spilled some of pokie while we were too engrossed playing Bridge on the beach!

PICT8002

PICT8002
Originally uploaded by djgemz.

this is pokie on his first time out in sentosa! on top of him is pokie-lookalike biscuit, which was eaten up by me.

:: happy ::

overslept as usual... brought my laptop to outside mac to lend to my cca.

went up to the comp lab to take attendance.. alas, quah was here already.

went to the cca booth to help give survey to the freshmen... i saw...CHEE WAI SIONG!!!! pai seh sia he recognised me... =X felt quite happy abt it also la.. *fa hua chi* i jioed him when i was in sec 1.. haha those were the days...

but i din c "christmas boy" today... hmm...

doing work...discovered i can sign into msn in sch!

:: tired ::

been slping kinda late the last few nites... kinda upset over the fact tt the printing of the stuff for campus crusade couldn't be completed on friday... that shop use all mac computers... then cannot read my thumb drive... i thot i was smart to prepare a backup copy in zip disk, but who noes they did not have zip drive.... i had to send them an email with the soft copy that nite.

then they say their shop opens at 10.30, i can collect the stuff at lunch time when i'm supposed to have it ready by monday morning.. i'm also supposed to be in class at 9am... i noe i always come late la.. but still itz not v nice to use tt time to go collect stuff rite? i guess i'm juz upset tt the shop opens so late n it will onli start their job at 10.30am..... i'll realli feel v bad if i delay the schedule for the recruitment drive!!!

tonite i wanna slp earlier liao... i nv do anything for IMPJ over the weekend... but i hope it can still be completed by friday.... then i'll be relieved of one big burden.

then i'll have PRC to deal with... hope i can get as much help as i can for it!

hmm oh today haha.. sermon was great. abt Zeal. i realise tt i lost the zeal for things in my life.. i dun work hard in sch, at times i fall asleep during quiet time.. when pple ask mi abt whether i like something or not, my answer is usually "ok la..." "not bad lor"... gotta pray abt it.

anyway got a cactus plant from psalmist - everyone gets one as publicity for psalmist retreat. i got a yellow flower one.. dunno choose yellow or red better but nvm la... my surname wad. had lunch with shirley, elena n andrielle at harbourfront.. i brought Pokee (similar name to vinee) to sentosa... met sou mun my mei mei on the way there...

i went down into the water n juz soaked myself totally, then came onshore to continue play Bridge... i learnt tt game today!! quite cheem... n intellectual, as kwek puts it.. haha.. some china tourists came n took photos of us (!@#$%^!!!!!) yunz n mi were in bikini lor... they like dun respect our privacy sia... still smile at us as if we allow them to take photos of us... !@#$%^&*!!!!! my back was facing the sun... so i think i burnt my back.. haha..

around 6 we changed clothes then i went to geylang to look for my dad for dinner... v nice day today... get to see a lot of old shophouses... took photos.. then a tourist approached mi n asked mi abt the camera... there was language barrier cuz he couldn't realli speak english.. bought dim sum home... yummy~ looked for aunt to borrow helmet so tt my dad could send mi home.

:: messy ::

a lot of thots gathered today...

haha i din realise suddenly so many pple read my blog, esp after i so buey hiao bai say got guys look at me.. haha *gasp*!

hmm... actually i dun mind being rostered on psalmist regularly la, at least there's a fixed schedule already, not like last min or wad... i juz find it hard to choose between campus crusade n cell grp. cuz there's gonna be another outing tt will fall on saturday... anyway i'm kinda crazy lor, say i v busy, but i still go for job interview..... but at least keep me occupied la... better than getting attached.. haha..

today i made the decision to go for the FUL training.. was late, together with some others.. we waited v long for the bus.. then when we alighted then i realised tt the venue was not downtown east chalet. led worship with noel playing the guitar for me.. this is kinda my 1st time leading worship, tt's if dun count the time i led worship for sunday school in tanjung balai. i felt kinda nervous, dunno wad to say, wad to pray... but it was alright la...

the guys called me abang.. haha.. means 'brother' in malay. fun.. it was warm, n i had ice cream... went near the beach for a time of retreat... realli appreciate the nature God created. love the sea breeze, the sun n the sea! haha.. today i feel someone is v good looking... n someone is still v charming.. haha *secret*

:: heheh ::

went to the gym yday with john.. wanted to run at the track, but too many pple liao.. think the track cca pple got training. noticed a guy kept looking at me since he came in.. (haha!)

went for kelas bahasa after tt. thank God sarah came, cuz i dun realli dare to interrupt the class to ask some questions, but with her i m more bold.

haha feel quite happy when i think tt guys r looking at me... hahaha... :P

today was not bad too... saw a lot of cute guys on the train.. went to toa payoh with swee yi to print some campus crusade stuff.. gotta apologise for using IMPJ time to do cca stuff.. gareth like kept reminding me to do my work, until i a bit sian diao...

now, at the printing shop, my thumb drive dunno y stopped working on mac, so i offered my zip disk... but they dun have zip drive. -.- so i had to go home to email them. had dinner at toa payoh central then went to esplanade for job interview with her... it was realli a last min decision la... i dunno y i'm juz so attracted to the night life in the city...

:: :S ::

my saturday is screwed.. maybe tt's not such a nice term to put it. but i have ALOT of activities, dunno which one to go.. those who noe mi will noe tt i hate events to clash.

1) campus crusade Follow-Up Leader training at pasir ris chalet (n i'm leading worship for tt, muz also design brochure by then)
2) sentosa outing with my sec sch good friends to celebrate yun's bday
3) sentosa outing with cell grp (according to the sms i juz received from jabez)
4) cell grp at 3pm
5) worship prac - projection

i think tt's all.... argh!

next sat

1) IM class chalet at pasir ris
2) collect books for PRC (muz come up with guitar course forms n chordbook publicity by then)
3) persis they all going to tanjung balai.... staying at my fav family's house somemore... =..(

:: thanks hx ::

hmm thanks huixiang for calling me last nite n advise me wad to do altho i nv do it in the end...

all the unhappiness juz built up n i had to let go la.. i dun blame anyone for making me unhappy, juz glad tt itz gone now... read Psalms 22 and 23... makes me feel better too... then i tried to get a good nite's rest. had a nitemare.... i dreamt of a girl who was under the control of something evil.. she fell in love with a guy n wants to get away from tt evil thing, but tt thing kept causing trouble wherever she goes... i realise probably tt's a message, to let me noe tt i've been struggling with the evil one... but ultimately i wan to break free n follow close to the one i love... i believe i have a choice!

anyway today was quite good... i wore shorts to sch.. kinda hesitated very long, trying to decide if i shld... but in the end i juz wore la... i juz wanna feel comfortable... i'm getting fat n can't fit comfortably in my bottoms anymore.... :(

the lecturers help give suggestions for some of the design n content... which helps super a lot... helps me to be more open minded to accept gareth's ideas...

went to north canteen for lunch... today is realli like a day i can do anything i like.. haha..

wanted to stay in sch to do work until lab close, but i dun feel like staying..so went home. my parents ordered dinner for me, coincidentally itz wad i had for lunch.. -.- haha...

tonite i'm not gonna slp.. at least, until i m satisfied with my progress then i can slp ba... realli worried abt the proj...

:: sucky ::

i'm feeling sucky rite now.... struggling in a grp project with 2 guys... we worked together quite well on an earlier project, dun understand how come now our relationship is so sucky...

if i throw tantrum, they will think tt girls r petty. if i cry to show them how upset i am, they will be irritated cuz guys generally HATE to c girls cry. if i juz heck care abt it, i will be wasting my time now n fail the proj later. if i bear with it, i will be working unhappily like wad i'm doing now.

juz read the conversation log tt john sent me a few days ago.. sounds like i have been pushy abt the topic. very useless, becuz i dun have much an idea abt it n dunno wad i wan for the interface. i c gareth's unwillingness whenever i try to convince him of something n then i'll feel v discouraged... i feel very unmotivated as i c them being unmotivated too... i can tell tt among all the grps in my class, my grp looks the most unhappy...

but i still wan to apologise, if they're reading this... tt i have been too bossy... such a *****... useless *****. this will be our last proj together n i guess we wun c each other anymore after presentation.

:: angry ::

some pple juz makes me angry...

very unhappy on sat... yday a bit unhappy, but alright la. feeling sucky today.

a lot of things to do...

a lot of things happening.

:: IMPJ stress ::

sian.... everyday i go to sch with a calm heart.... after 5 mins i become heated up... wan to beat pple up n throw things around n juz walk out of the lab lor... but of cuz tt's not the right thing to do.

i dun think many pple can make mi so angry. forget it... i shall not be a petty person... Lord, help!!!!

everyone also stress abt their own things... hardly can find pple to tok with n get ideas from... when i'm stressed, ideas can hardly flow out of me... i need to look ard, ask pple for ideas... sometimes i'm juz so stuck in something tt i forget to look at things at another perspective.

gotta say i'm sorry for my campus crusade recruitment committee for waiting so long for me to come for the meeting today... i muz get some ideas from the lecturers... muz be patient to wait for them to discuss finish with another grp...

now huixiang is slping on my bed... haha... she's too tired out from working on her project... swee yi is also v upset abt her grp project.... haiz...

later i need to work on my pc n let huixiang use the laptop... so cya~!

:: verse of the day ::

Matthew 6:34
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

:: =D ::

i was all smiles on my way home...

guess y?

well... i went to the post office to claim my mail.... cool.... a big box! present!! =D peeked inside, saw something adidas, saw 2 magazines too... i guessed correct, the mail came from ICT!!! the 2 magazines muz have been the 1st n 4th issue... cuz i mentioned tt i have 2nd, 3rd n 5th only... i realli din expect them to send the ones i missed out!! so generous of them! i saw the stamp, costs 699 baht! so expensive!!! probably S$28! i feel so touched, so happy.... muz support them if they have a chance to import to singapore... getting sweeyi n huixiang to support them too...!

today is the 1st day of IMPJ... quite sian.... i can't stand someone sia... not many pple can piss me off easily one lor... i hate it when pple touch my stuff without permission... itz especially rude to play games on my laptop when i'm not around/din give permission... n esp after itz so obvious tt i'm not happy abt it!

:: scared ::

felt v scared..... my parents went fishing.... v scared they might meet yau... keep imagining things... violent images of murder... =S like throwing their bodies off the kelong... kept praying for their safety, n their enjoyment.. thank God they came back safely, but first thing they did when they called me was scold me... =( spoil my day sia....

yday went to sentosa with my cell grp... dunno how come i can sleep until 12pm... supposed to meet them at 1. was raining... i decided not to go for christine's grad ceremony in the end... i noe tt i spend little time with my cell grp... so gotta make up for it...

glad tt i went... itz a gd time to take a break after my modules end, b4 my impj starts... chatted with zane... the rest played volleyball.. i dun realli like to play ball games... i dun like rough games... went off at 6pm... hope i got a bit of tan heh.

went for worship prac... din noe i was not scheduled for this week... i juz copied my duties into my calendar n juz took a look to c if i'm on this wk or not... i did put in vocalist duty for this week.. but itz good la, esther can take a break, maybe if she got work to do, she can do on sat, then keep sunday sabbath. i dun realli keep sabbath.... but i think i need to. i also need to resolve something abt the softwares i'm using... i can't let them go right away...slowly i guess... i've taken away those i dun need...

today overslept... i woke up at 7.40am... supposed to reach church at 8.15. got out of my home at 8am... walked to find an atm... i only had $6 on me... by then it was 8.15. i panicked when i couldn't catch a cab even at 8.40...8.50... i finally called the cab company to book a cab. haiz. reached church at 9.30 like tt... today qingming alot of pple wan to sweep graves tt's y i couldn't catch a cab. either the streets (in punggol) r empty, or else the cabs r hired, on call, or busy. =( v panic when i waited... prayed tt God will send me a cab specially for me... i intervened when i waited too long, by making the call... well, the cab was realli sent specially for me... the driver even addressed my name!! haha...

after service i had lunch with cell grp.... long time no lunch with them ba.... sometimes i gotta take the effort... zane is right, jac is working v hard to bring the cell grp together... sometimes she feels discouraged... so wad i can do to help her is to ease her load...

then went to meet hx n sweeyi... took bus to great world city... we missed our stop (my fault)... n walked to the shopping city. went to meet jin wen, cat n alex... wh, kenneth, zejian n weili arrived later. waited for yuling n yihao too. we tried to find our way to the tp diploma show... thank God it only rained after we went inside...

i found the tp students' works not tt appealing to me.. perhaps cuz i'm not feeling v good. yc asked for directions but i dunno how to give... went out in the rain to meet him with sweeyi n hx. felt happy abt walking in the rain.... v fun. but i was not wearing the right shoes...

continue to look at the students' works... i find the students dress until too funky tt i find it weird. as if they dun belong to singapore... i think dmd looks more normal... haha... =P criticised their film project... =X so bad haha.. then we whole grp went off after the rained stopped. walked back to great world city. had dinner at KFC... luxury food sia. as usual we were laming together...

took photos at the Weng Heng shop... will post photos later... haha... v funny pics... but some i dun think i shld post on internet la... =X

went to orchard with sweeyi, hx, yc n kenneth. looked at toys in taka.. then andy came to pass stuff to hx.. offered us a ride in his car..woohoo~! he drove hx home then drove me to kovan where i took bus home. my mom called to nag lor... scolded me for not coming home on time at 8 as i said i might. haiz. she bought herbal chicken from johor so she wanted to heat it up for dinner...

anyway last nite i received a notification of a parcel sent to me... happy to have something in the mail for me.. but i was not at home, so the notification said to collect it on working days. well monday lor. i saw the address doesn't have my postal code, then i saw beside the "To" word was some thai characters... so i guessed tt it came from thailand. but the handwriting doesn't look like my sis'... i din think of it until i realised it might be from ICT! a magazine i bought from thailand.. i like it so much tt i emailed the editor how come there isn't a website for ICT... he saw my interest in getting the magazine from singapore, so he decided to do something abt it... furthermore he mentioned abt sending me a token of appreciation tt i support their magazine! well itz realli nice wor... if it comes to singapore i muz encourage my frenz to buy!

john got an ibook.. haha... i wonder he's number wad in IM to get ibook... haha m i influencing my frenz? haha... i think i can be apple evangelist liao... sad tt i dun evangelise abt the right things..

:: stress ::

last nite din slp well... partly due to indigestion, partly due to stress..

ate super lot yday... cheese pancake, half of mcspicy double, donut, 1 and a half ramly burger (yummy!~) n half lor mai kai... in a day.. no proper meal..

went to sch to do web project.. quite confident of finishing it at first, but at 6.50 i left n seems still quite a bit not done.. we do until forgot our initial agreements..

went for kelas.. sarah joined us today... yay feel more comfortable, also becuz Ibu tasha teaches well.. still a bit cannot catch wad teacher is talking..

i felt stressed abt 3 things, 1 is web presentation, 1 is digi test (which turned out to be chicken), 1 is dilemma.. dunno where to go tmr.. i mean, dunno which to go.. my cell grp going to sentosa, there's a graduating ceremony for Campus Crusade Staff. happening at the same time, so i dunno which to go..

actually i feel calvin is v charming.. hmm haha.. but i still feel not v comfortable with him... *shrugs*

hey hx, u take care ok!
ting, kinda great to noe tt u're coming to nyp.. but sadly i feel this course sux. i fear the next batch got a lot of immature pple...

:: long time ::

hmm.. long time no online..

anyway i juz made an observation. i learnt one thing abt myself... i seem to be able to get comfortable with non-christian guys, but i'm juz not comfortable around christian guys.. maybe tt's y all the guys i realli like r non-christians? this is quite terrible, so i pray tt God will change my mindset.

anyway today is also the day i become v convicted tt the purpose for our lives is to carry out the Great Commission. instead of just being interested in our personal spiritual growth, we ought to evangelise in everywhere we go n everything we do. tt's y i'm so attracted to missions. esp overseas mission, where i can c diff nationality pple worshiping God in diff languages!

i hope u guys r convicted of evangelism too... fulfil the Great Commission together!

:: fate ::

supposed to meet ting in sch to run at 10am... but i felt lazy.. (still in bed at 9am!) hahaha... then changed plan to go walk walk in causeway point. she took a taxi to meet me n found a wallet at the backseat! fate sia... the wallet got a lot of orange and blue colour notes!

we had lunch at Jack's Place (nan de i feel like splurging - my own money la) n we kept joking and laughing in there... the appetiser was great, but main course so-so onli. after taking our time to walk around, we took mrt to fajar to return the wallet to the owner.

the owner was v v happy to get her ic back on top of so much money n she gave us a $50 note to reward us! of cuz being nice sweet little powerpuff girls we refused at first. but she realli insisted cuz she was realli grateful, so we accepted it. (i was thinking, out of so much money, $50 seems like a small amt to her!) ting n i laughed abt it cuz we had joked abt this earlier on, n it came true! anyway we parted at cck mrt.

i went to sch for cca. shared with my dg abt the incident. today is sharing time n we used the time to encourage each other with verses. there's one i found in my quiet time - "Be sure to do what you should, for then you will enjoy the personal satisfation of having done your work well, and you won't need to compare yourself to anyone else." Galatians 6:4 - cuz as u all noe, i'm a person with v v low self esteem, always not able to take pride in my work... hope this verse will lift my spirits whenever i feel down again!

after dg went for connection. watch the last part of Passion of the Christ... v gruesome... itz to remind us tt Christ died for our sins, so we ought to live redeemed lives. there's another story to illustrate this theory: there was once a man called george. he has wife n a son n a job at a railway station. his job is to operate the bridge further down the station, to lower it for trains to pass. one day his wife died, n george had to bring his son along to work because there would be no one else to take care of him at home. his son likes to play by the railroad but is careful to keep away from trains whenever his dad warns him. one day, a train arrived ahead of schedule. george's son was playing by the railway as usual, but george was unable to warn him this time. as the train neared the bridge, he had to make a decision to lower the bridge n kill his son or to keep the bridge raised, n kill everyone on the train. at this time, he made the decision, to lower the bridge. think abt this, there were countless pple on the train, a family having lunch together on the train, a couple chatting happily, children running abt... all of them did not know tt george's son had died so tt they could still live. of cuz u can say itz the son's fault to be ignorant of the train's arrival, but its juz an analogy, of a person having to sacrifice a life to save many. these pple ought to cherish their lives even more if they knew tt they could have died instead.

anyway after connection i went to blk L to do my authoring assignment... then got my dad to fetch me... waited for him until i got 4 mosquito bites sia~!

:: no slp n slp ::

i worked on my web design assignment 1 the whole sunday nite... itz due on monday n i still got a lot not done.. typical me la... anyway i nv slp at all, felt a bit weak on my way to sch, but dun realli feel tired... i think if i slp i will want to slp more. authoring lesson is rubbish, waste time onli.... went to library to borrow the thai book again.

on my way home i keep slping on the bus... v reluctant to wake up and walk home. when i reached home i went to slp immediately.. woke up for a phone call but went back to lalaland after tt. i rem dreaming abt wanling joining us for lessons, i also dreamt tt i went to malaysia by myself. boarded a ferry. i was standing while the ferry was still at dock, i turned around n saw yau toking to someone beside me... then i quickly turned back. he asked tt person behind me, "wad's she doing here?" n i was kinda afraid wad will happen next... he got off the ferry n i nv saw him again. this ferry went to the kelong where i met him... i juz travelled without a purpose... unknowingly got myself there...

anyway i slept until my mom woke me up for sch.. my sis had already left... i rem waking up at around 3am to wipe my drool... (oops!) n i heard a door close... wondered how come at tt time someone is still awake. quite reluctant to wake up for jap class.. kinda expected some stupid games session.. when i arrived they were listening to music... doraemon.. -.-" then we did some japanese workout, played bingo, played janken pon (hei bai pei).. i won 3 rounds... haha.. went to library to read the latest Home Concepts magazine then went to chunfang's hse to borrow vcds...

i wan to sell my stuff away... feel tt i dun need so many stuff anyway... when i die itz also easier to clear my things tt way... hmm.. haha..

Vinee

PICT8672
Originally uploaded by djgemz.

this is vinee... the name on this can is vinee, but the type of flower is vinca. she's cute rite? been 3 weeks old already... it should bloom within the next month.

:: vinca ::

i juz realise tt my flower is vinca... but i always read it as vinee (cursive writing la)... so.. which one sounds nicer?

:: haha ::

u noe wad i'm doing now? my pc keyboard is on my lap while i'm typing on my ibook! i can only use my ibook to surf internet n i'm bia-ing the web review assignment tonight.. i actually aimed to finish by last nite, but by 1.30am i couldn't take it already.

today i din fall asleep during service even tho i've had little slp.. i actually fell asleep sitting on my bed during quiet time last nite, woke up at around 4am to switch off the light n slp properly.

went for lunch with cell grp.. been a long time since.. kinda sad tt i dun realli catch their topics. i'm back to the state where i feel tt i can't clique with my cell grp... they always seem rich enough to shop in esprit, chill out at NYDC, buy mp3 players together... i suddenly feel v broke... on my way back i prayed n consoled myself tt at least i dun indulge things tt i cannot bring to heaven? hmm... i think at this age itz hard to find pple who have similar philosophy as me... i guess tt's y i'm antisocial most of the time... i feel tt i can onli be myself around frenz like huixiang n ting... i feel kinda sad tt i dun like to tok abt fashion, branded stuff, so itz like i seldom tok to the guys in my class cuz tt's wad they often tok abt... i'm really shutting myself in again...

hmm.. besides tt.. i have a crush on my classmate... i often imagine being together with him... but itz bad... affects my concentration in the things i do... i muz control myself! hmmph... when i was still a kid i always dare to declare my admiration for my crushes.. but now cannot anyhow liao...

anyway i've got no holiday anymore wor... going to year 3 straight after IMPJ... how would i survive without God sia...

mom nagged at sis abt going back to phuket again.. honestly i have intentions to go work there also... but itz obvious tt my parents wun be happy abt it...

:: stress ::

sambal kangkong always make me sick....

haiz...lately v stress..
went to work out on wed, din eat much for the past few days... been slping less also.. i think all tt will make mi slim down ba.. haha..

my sis come back already.. the ICT mag she brought back for me is not as exciting leh, but still very rich in high res graphics...

last nite i went for kelas bahasa.. resume lessons liao.. chamz i was not catching up with the lesson... too long nv berbicara bahasa.. somemore i learn thai halfway.. got a bit mixed with thai n indonesia.. i almost replied 'nit noi' when the guru asked if i rem wad i learnt.. went home after tt n typed a short email to my son.. sent feedback to the ICT mag... n did a lot of rubbish stuff.. went to slp onli at 4.30am...

almost couldn't wake up this morning, but thank goodness i can take my time on fridays..

been talking to joanne, valerie, yvonne n huiyee.. got to noe them better.. jo n val praise pple and it makes pple feel better abt themselves.. jo went to YEP trip b4.. so we chatted abt thailand n the pple we met n the things we did there. chatted with val on the mrt on my way to hx's hse for filming last wk.. got to noe her more abt the things she likes n dislikes, n her opinions of some things.. yvonne is v serious in her work.. tt's something i lack... i realli can't think of any of my work tt i can take pride in sia.. n huiyee is v understanding when i told her tt i feel tired to do work.. haiz... towards the end of the semester i realli feel like juz getting it over n done with.... no motivation to work hard sia.. feel so discouraged when i got back my 3D assignments results... some pple do simple design, but they can get better grades... i feel v upset over tt... =(

i feel scared of attachment..... haiz.. got my year 3 schedule already... i believe itz God's plan for me how i spend my third year... i juz gotta pray tt it wouldn't clash with church activities n other activities like my kelas bahasa...

:: back ::

got a lot of my feelings to share suddenly... well i've been filming for the last week already, itz realli not easy acting, i doubt i'll be an actress... act as nerd girl in hx's scripts still can. haha..

yday, sat no cell grp. went to ling's house to meet the grp.. her dog v cute.. but, i still always always prefer cats~! had pizza n ice cream..yummy~ then we took taxi out to ecp for outdoor shooting. took quite a while to find the "perfect" spot, n to set up all tt... the worrying thing is tt they only had a battery tt can last for not very long. there was a point i suddenly imagined that i saw yau, n he was threatening to kill me.. then i realised tt i had been imagining things, n i also realise tt i looked v worried.. i dun think the rest of the pple noticed la.. anyway when it was my turn to act it was very fast.. i myself think tt i din do a good job, but peilin decided to wrap up the day after a few diff angles, n just one take each, of my scene.

then we walked out.. mi n peilin walked a very very long way to Parkway parade for dinner at Yoshinoya's. she treat me to the kare don thingy... not bad onli.. but we had heart to heart talk, for very long, juz to share how we feel abt things, how's our personality like towards things, wad kinda guys we like etc.. then we took bus home.. when we boarded the bus 62 i saw some guys, they're quite cute la.. but then later i realised tt they r the ones i saw b4, who live at the same block as mi.. i wonder if they noticed mi, n i imagined them telling each other to wait for me (i walked quite slowly n one of them turned around once in a while).. o.0 hehehehehe

anyway this morning i overslept.. supposed to wake up at 5am but i snoozed my alarm clock... in the end woke up at 6.30! panic sia.. i rushed (thank God i packed my bag last nite) out at around 7am (supposed to meet persis they all at 7 at harbourfront) waited quite long for a cab. tt taxi driver siao de, sped all the way sia! he onli slowed down where there was a traffic accident (n police were around the area) but not long after tt he picked up speed again! i was like thinking to myself: "Lord pls dun let me get into an accident... i realli want to go balai v much!!" i reached at 7.20am... not so bad, managed to catch everyone chatting at delifrance.. haha

i dunno how many times i've said this, but i realli miss the balai pple a lot... miss until wan to cry sia..

reached liao balai then we took oplik to the church in baran dua. we waited for the door of the church to be opened as we walked around the pasar. bought soya bean drink from ah zui n maggi mee goreng n prendjak tea n some bubur kopi from the shops there. waited for the meral children to arrived then i started with leading worship for the sunday sch... my 1st time leading worship i guess.. i always have a problem praying out loud (not to mention in chinese or hokkien!), n also start singing with the music instruments..

persis shared the story of nehemiah building the wall of jerusalem.. then after tt the girls went upstairs to learn tamborine (rebana) dance from sarah. persis n i went out to buy teh-o bing for them.. saw ah yang... haiz he's like not attending church anymore.. =( asked wati abt her brothers n aimei.. had fried rice for lunch.. after tt wati's mom arrived with aimei... asked her mom abt frenky n wiky.. frenky had been back from tj pinang already, so i asked her wad's he doing now, y nv help in the church anymore... i realli feel sad tt he left church. she said he might come to church later.. but got to go work soon after tt. then wiky had been working after sch. haiz... i thot wiky had been spritually stronger than frenky, but he also quit church cuz of work. anyway i got to c frenky in the end.. felt quite happy, but it was v brief cuz he went to work b4 i cld tok to him.

after service we took the ferry back to singapore... sucks eh waited for half an hour b4 the ferry arrived.... then a lot of pple going back to singapore... no proper seats for us.. then i realli dun wan to sit beside all the DOM lor... =S in the end sat between 2 women. not so bad.. ate up my tempe n pisang goreng.. yummy~! had dinner at the food junction n got a ride from a chinese cong couple who also live in punggol.

PICT8507

PICT8507
Originally uploaded by djgemz.

my baby flower! dunno wad name to give it..

PICT8509

PICT8509
Originally uploaded by djgemz.

from ting =)

:: Scorpion ::

hmm i always lazy to update.. but last sunday, i went out with ting after returning books at Crest.. i anyhow take bus then landed myself near ACJC.. =S supposed to meet her at Queensway... she bought me nike Scorpion! the shopkeepers told her one of the balls there was scorpion, but i dun think so. i rem scorpion as VERY reflective and has a scorpion image de. so we finally got the one i was looking for~! then we went to Mac to buy ice cream, which melted SUPER fast in the rain n humid weather.. we were walking across to IKEA. bought some stuff... quite heavy... one of the straps of my "china" handbag broke =( my parents called to ask mi to go find them in church. passed them the stuff n i went home empty handed.

i'll upload my scorpion picture later.. right now i dun have space in my room to display it so itz in the storeroom =X

:: nitemare ::

had a nightmare last nite... dreamt abt ghosts... i was in some place.... like surin, n there was a children's camp too. i rem going there to help with some of my frenz, i think including hx (n her bf?), peilin, n i dun realli rem the rest. it was the end of the camp already n we have packed up for home. halfway on the trip home (we were on the mrt) i rem i left a lot of things behind, so we went back to get them. my beloved bolster was one of the things i left behind. i rem toking to my kor, seb, n he told mi tt he had moved to clementi, near my old house. i also rem dunno y i was hugging wh.. haha..

back at the camp, Ibu lita was around. she allowed mi to go back to pack my stuff.. the room i was in was kinda dark n built using planks of wood. while packing my stuff (i was alone) i saw ghosts.. but i didn't seem to be v affected by tt..

hmm tt's all i rem abt the nitemare...

Picture 084

Picture 084
Originally uploaded by djgemz.

it was nite time when we went there.. a lot of mosquitoes... the thing is, he didn't bother to send mi home. cuz it was late. duh! but the view was breath taking la... hmmph..

:: dreams ::

been having v weird dreams this days... itz not common for mi to have dreams la. usually itz a not a gd sign. it means tt i haven't been slping well.

i rem on wed nite i dreamt that i was going thru a wedding ceremony with jiewei! we were at SAJC lecture theatre 2... v funny rite? halfway thru the ceremony, sort of a break time for us, i cldn't find jw anywhere.. i even looked for him at a "make up room".. but i decided tt i dun like the thought of losing my"husband" on my wedding day, so i rewinded my dream so tt he didn't "run away" at all. instead, halfway thru the ceremony, we decided to go out for a walk. tt place reminded mi of the old national library area, just tt the place looked more spacious, as if it weren't singapore. there was a building tt looked kinda futuristic. white+ glass, unique structure, single-level museum tt housed design materials n articles. after walking thru it we decided tt we've been out for a long time, should go back to continue our ceremony... well i hadn't looked into the mirror so i didn't actually c myself in a gown.

hahaha... up till here r u laughing like mad already?

cuz i got a weird dream last nite too. i dreamt tt i was a guy.. i rem vaguely tt i have a deep voice, n tt i had a crush on a girl. i was in a room with a group of abt 10 pple, in a v old building... doesn't seem like modern singapore also.. it was the birthday of one of the guys. it seems tt the tradition of celebrating the birthdays with this grp of pple is to trick the guy into believing tt he's not welcome among us, n then after tt we wld surprise him with warm birthday greetings. so we started to leave the room, leaving him to be the last. he couldn't catch up with us. we went inside a lift to go downstairs. dunno how come rachael chen was with us too.. so i asked her y were we doing this, treating tt poor guy like tt.. so she explained wad we wld do to surprise him later. first we juz have to avoid him. when the lift reached the first level, we saw a lot of kids, itz like we were in a pri sch. i went "hiding" with the girl tt i like. we went to the sch field... it was like an amusement park with roller coasters. i saw many weird but fun-looking machines. we sat together somewhere and took out our laptops. she asked if i joined this virtual chat community. i have, so i decided to surf the website. i tried to type out the web address but i seem to keep typing wrongly. i rem hugging her too.. she had long hair n was wearing white long sleeved. tt's y i think i dreamt as myself as a guy.

hmm.. tt's all the details i can recall. then esther called to wake mi up, to go church early.

i've been to clarke quay mrt station twice these few days. but i wasn't armed with my camera... cuz i saw views that i realli want to capture on my camera. the cat tt was on the steps at the mrt station, was still at the same spot. if i get to c it there at the same place again, i wld take a photo of it n name it the resident cat of clarke quay mrt station! anyway, at the entrance of the mrt station was swissotel merchant court hotel. swissotel....... reminds mi of bryan... suddenly all the memories juz came back to me.. i thot of the times we went out... hmm.. kinda miss him.. argh, then again... =S

well, when memories come back to me, usually itz a sign of PMS. jus to clarify, guys, PMS means pre menstrual syndrome, not something tt happens DURING. at least, tt's for me la.

:: crybaby ::

haiz... so many times already, i do work until so stress... feel like crying, but managed to control.....

so long no update... nothing much to say la.... wed went to take photos with wan n weng heng.. then came to sch to return camera n also DG, followed by lo hei with Campus Crusade.

thur stayed at home the whole day... wanted to come to sch at first, but decided to juz stay at home la.. went out in the evening to meet my sec sch gang..

fri went home straight after sch to slp... but dunno y like cannot slp... went out to meet my cell grp for dinner.. they wanted to go for the UK funfair... i decided to save tt money... (i'd rather spend money on food)

went to church early for campus rampus, SAJC fundraising carnival.. a lot ALOT of gd looking guys~! =P~~~ but i think they're mostly younger than me.. well anyway, they're just ice cream for my eyes onli... can c cannot eat.. then cell grp n Path exam. i felt v sad... cuz many pple said things tt stumbled me... felt as if there was spiritual attack in our church today..

so this wk... i had most of my dinners outside... v busy... little time to spend with my family...

sunday... i rushed off after service to have lunch with my parents in Han's.. i get to save money when they treat me... haha... slacked too much today... kinda forgot tt i got assignment to submit tmr.... did until 2am like tt then decided to slp.. cuz i dunno how to do~!

:: umm ::

pls pray for my sis' health..

:: happy V-day~! ::

today, i'm v happy to meet many of my old frenz, n hang out with my poly frenz..

bumped into dawn, hong tat, chee yap, sheena, abel... etc.. went out with huixiang, swee yi, yanqiao, ian, sandy n tak yee... walked a lot today, until i dulan... =X juz felt v sian n no mood to do anything other than sit down n chill out.. hmm.. seems like i've found the wrong pple to chill out with.. =X well not trying to say anything, juz tt some things i enjoy doing with some pple.. it depends on who it is n wad activity...

reached sch quite on time.. heng mr alex nv ask mi to present web review....! v distracted after he gave a lecture on flash components halfway... haiz my attention span getting shorter... overjoyed when i heard tt we dun haf authoring lesson today. called ting n chatted... she gave mi a shock with her latest news man! felt kinda worried for her... juz dun feel tt tt guy is a suitable bf for her... i feel kinda disappointed in relationships u c.. kinda no hope in getting into another one....yet.
gave the girls in my class flowers for v-day.. had lunch in south canteen with the guys.. went to amk, wanted to bank in my ang pow money, but long queue sia.. so i walked around, looked for vcds, gifts for my ah lian n lao gong..

walked to somerset to look at cds.. wanted to get vcds... but juz couldn't get the one i wan... bought bearbrick n a disney toy for hx, paid a bit for an animation vcd for swee yi.. tt's my v day gift for them.. then walked to heeren n met sandy, tak yee, ian n yan qiao.. long time no hang out with them.. had dinner at marche's.. yummy~!~ but sad thing is, i used to be unable to finish my ham n cheese crepes... now, i can finish it n eat more stuff~! =S

after dinner, sandy's fren came.. we walked around heeren then walked to taka.. i needed to go to kino to buy my jap textbook... i was supposed to own one long time ago.. =X tmr got jap test, so buy it to study.. but i doubt i will la.. by the time i reach home.....

chilled out at coffee bean in taka... walked to somerset mrt.. gee i guess i'm glad we did.. i caught a glimpse of someone from church.. but i doubt he saw mi.. haha itz ok.. tired tired...

welcome to pulau ubin 

at pulau ubin jetty... i realli believe this is my first time there altho my dad told mi i've been there b4.. hmm~ 

:: first times ::

haha v happy.. cuz 2005 is getting more happening.. n i luv my life to be happening!~ alright, enuf crap... to me, happening means doing alot of things for the first time. so wad first times have i done so far? alright, enuf crap too.

- dining at yuki sushi (u ask, like this also counted? i reply, yes!)
- visiting shirley's house
- visiting jinwen's hse
- going to pulau ubin!!! (tt leads to my tales of adventure below)
- riding a bike... (uh.. i was merely the pillion rider of a 2-seater)
- gee..can't think of anymore at the moment?

well.. wanna thank weng heng n hilwan for helping n encouraging me to ride a bike today =P tt 3 hrs in ubin seem quite long leh.. felt as if i've explored the whole island already...

hmm.. been visiting frenz for the past few days.. on friday i visited shirley, she made bobochacha's chawanmushi n cold creamy corn custard n we played cluedo.. i kinda like the game, juz tt it got a bit draggy.. went off at 5 to go to jinwen's place at kovan.. quite near aijia's place.. he got a jack russell named vicky or something... hmm i made a comment tt caused everyone to ask y? =P i said, after i c jinwen's dog, i'm beginning to love cats even more.. well.. i guess i juz dun like anything to keep touching me? umm.. cats r more suitable for me ba. i realised tt ian notices my lame jokes... itz realli nice of him to respond to them.. n i find tt ze jian is v sweet to help peel the prawns for steamboat, even if itz as wad he says, for himself, i believe he has a kind soul =P n i noticed joanne's eyebrows, v nice.. i lost around $6 in blackjack.. but itz ok la.. took bus back with yunting, heng we still got bus.. zj n hm missed their bus so they had to take taxi..

sat went to miss amy's hse, even tho i was nv taught by her.. i was close to grp 5 enuf to go visiting with them =P then went for cell grp... after tt rushed off to my parents' cell grp member's hse.. honestly i dun like the food.. as usual being the food-picky me. chatted with ruifen, ruijie's sister n encouraged her to join youth service on sunday. chatted also with eunice, hannah tang, naomi, cristal.. cristal's parents drove me home =) well, cuz my parents abandoned me.. =( sob sob.. juz kidding la. they went home by motorbike. i took kelvin's watch with me, cuz i was playing with it then forgot to return it.. hee~ =P

then today met kwek n diana b4 going into the sanctuary for service. after tt rushed off to ubin.. kinda late, 3pm when i reached there.. but still able to catch some nice shots on my minolta.

monday

it's best frenz day out~! hmm.. asked dionne out to gym but she tired la, so in the end nv go..
woke up at 10.30am... kinda late.. prepared to go out.. itz SUN-day~! sentosa~!! took lrt then mrt to harbourfront to meet ting.. had prata n milk tea.. judy came.. we took the shuttle bus into sentosa to have great sun+sand+sea fun! thought of asking yc also but we all girls la.. wanna wear bikini so dun wan to get guys to come along..

parked at siloso beach.. there's cute guys, there's a husky, there us, pretty babes~! =P it was HOT by the time we reached there.. i cldn't wait to get into the water~! i kept taking photographs but a bit scared to bring the camera near the sea... picked a lot of baby seashells.. uh..shit i think we threw them away? =(

we had a lot of crazy fun.. but the most disappointing thing is i missed catching the sunset... i mean i saw the red red ball.. but by the time i walked closer it was gone.. hidden behind clouds of pollution... =(

got kinda burnt... went to bathe.. there's this guy called joseph..i met him at sentosa b4..he found me familiar too.. but i pai seh to show tt i recognise him la... anyway he asked us to help him take care of his husky while he went to bathe.. then he felt obliged to return us the favour by driving us out... haiyaz i shld have rejected tt offer cuz i want to go watch the musical fountain n stay in sentosa longer wor. =(

went to noodle hut in harbourfront to have dinner. had la mian n dim sum.. happyzz~~

tuesday

rented DVDs to watch =P today is movie day~!!! watched like..3 movies at a go? sat in front of the tv the whole day..

wednesday

CNY visitation

thursday

CNY visitation

oh yah.. if i'm not wrong, yday was my (ahem) fav balai boy's bday.... sigh.. feel v sad when i think tt he's not in balai... n tt i cannot stay there overnight anymore~!!!! i dun understand y wor... =(

anywayz today went for movie with Audrey, thomas, diana, edmund, n adam.. thanks jieling for the movie ticket!!! i enjoyed the show.. i always love HK movies!~ i noticed tt i've been noticing the special effects and transitions.. (hoho influence by the DFVs?) after tt walked around bugis.. haha actually i was juz telling audrey abt rong fa n terry... n then WAH! so coincidental i met them in the Edge! audrey mentioned tt everytime she toks abt pple they will appear b4 her de...hahahaha.. then we bumped into them a second time, when terry said something "...angel" i heard my name then he realise tt i was rite in front of him haha.. hmm.. next time wanna tok bad abt mi make sure i'm not around first hor!~ juz jk la dun think they will tok bad abt mi.. i'm not so bad to tok abt anyway.. (haha?!)

after tt audrey left.. i went to kinokuniya to walk around.. wanted to look for the jap textbook (i still haven buy~~) but no stock leh.. saw a lot of mags n i was v tempted to buy.. no money anyway.

walked to bras basah to walk around.. saw a book a very very much wan to buy! but i kept telling myself, "no..." and "wait till i got money..." haiz...

this was a realli inspirational trip. but i dun realli feel like itz a day for photo taking.

hmm.. i'm going to say goodbye to all of u... i'm going somewhere far far away.....





no la, juz joking. i'm juz gonna fast from internet and all internet chatting for 1 wk starting from monday!! this will be a time of rest for my eyes (my short-sightedness is getting more n more serious) and for my spirit~ my course is computer related ma.. face the computer all day v tiring one.. of cuz i also wan to prove to God tt i have not made internet my idol, an addiction that has a hold over me.. itz juz something useful, but it wun control me~! hmm.. maybe some of u wun understand wad i'm trying to say.. but do support my fast by not tempting me!

c u, my dear blog.. until next week~!

haha kinda miss u.. as i sit here using the comp in my room i somehow think tt u r still slping in ur room.. haa but nvm.. itz fun to be away from home, even if u're working, cuz during ur off days, u're not in singapore! so convenient wor.. i'm so easily influenced by sights n sounds of outside singapore... wanna be there now too...

this morning yau called again.. i picked up.. this time i nv run around like a chicken! haha i faked a deep voice n told him he got the wrong number.. y does he call mi n look for geraldine? or did he juz pronounce my name wrongly?

anywayz.. i haven updated abt wed.. there was a mass evangelistic concert in my sch.. invited Parousia to perform.. it was great.. i can c their heart of worship.. juz tt i personally dun like accoustic music, find it boring to me..

after tt there was refreshment time.. went home kinda late..

then thur went to sch to use 3D max..

fri i juz felt tt if we can have access to sch resources might as well make full use of it.. the sch library buys magazines like Teenage, Home n Decor etc etc..i can save my money on mags by going to sch to read lor. sorry ah, my sis, no more mags for u to cut!

stayed in sch until 9 to use internet, listen to music etc etc in film studio..cool place~!

i feel disgusted.

they r so cute~! i like terence yin chi wai too~! i wanna buy the new police story vcd~!!!!! daniel wu!!~~!! edison~!!!~~ haha going gaga over boys....

my su-wai girl from surin... her name is...shucks i forgot. she's a v smart girl. 

jw looks v gd here... hmm i have a lot of nice photos of him.... but dun think i'll put all of them up la.. 

dunno y all the pics i take with him always blur.. -.- 

i forgot her name.. a teacher from surin.. 

mmm... broke up with him already, but dunno y he still calls mi dear... 

my ex bf... met him in msia... he's a gangster...